Нагиев – пенсии, стих в Кремле (English subs)

Нагиев – пенсии, стих в Кремле (English subs)


– Shush!
– What for? “Please. I beg you.” What do you think about the
pension reform? “Screw you…
Yuri Aleksandrovich.” “Who do you think you are,
you piece of shit?” “Do it yourself.” – Dmitry, are you well-rested?
– No. Why? You’re so thin today, Yuri.
What happened, pray tell? Dammit. Okay. I told you this before we started,
but I was gonna segue from it. Dmitry, my schedule is not
comparable to yours… Are you saying we’re doing this exactly
how you planned it? And in no other way? I have several plans for this interview.
Around 14. Let’s do it then. Anyway, my schedule is not
comparable to yours, but it’s gotten really crammed
lately. And then I suddenly discovered what happens
to schedules sometimes. This Sunday, I probably got the worst food
poisoning in my life. Not with alcohol. I was out of it for three
days. – And my whole schedule flew off the rails.
– Right. So coming down here,
I thought: what do YOU do in situations
like that? ‘Cause you’re not like me — I work with a few
people; you work with hundreds
of them. It’s a catastrophe. It is. The other day, I had a kidney stone move. I never had that before. A kidney stone started
moving. I didn’t realize it at first. I thought I just really needed to go,
but couldn’t. Turned out, it was a stone. We’re on a set. Probably a hundred people. I can’t stop the shoot. I can’t. ‘Cause we hired this venue for
a lot of money for today and tomorrow. It’s two days in this
venue. Big names… I can’t. And in this state, I… I won’t say what shoot it was but I’ll show
you the happy shots of a joyful Dima Nagiyev passing
a stone. I’d crawl into my trailer
and wail. I’m calling a doctor in Saint Petersburg whom
I don’t actually know. I met him once. I was doing some tests
or something, and had his phone written
down. I was in Moscow. I call him
and say, “Please, find someone who could help me
in Moscow.” He says, “But how can I find someone
in Moscow? I start crying.
I go, “I can’t leave.” This was about 2 PM. He says, “Okay, I’ll try.” He calls 30 minutes later
and goes: “I don’t know anyone in
Moscow, “but we do have a guru, the man who developed
all the methods, “all the kidney treatments
and stuff. “They gave me his number.
I haven’t met him. “He’s this god. A world
renowned… “Try calling him.” I call him. He picks up:
“Yes?” I start weeping into the
phone. You’re literally crying? I’m like: “Please! I beg you!
Please!” He says: “Calm down, Dima.
I’m ready. “I can see you’re REALLY
ready. “Now we just need to find the idiots
who’ll let us in tonight.” In a hospital, that is. “Give me some time.”
He calls back an hour later and says, “Don’t eat or drink.
Come to this hospital.” Then there was this whole adventure of getting
the stone out of me. But the fact remains…
Yes, disgusting business. In the morning, I went:
“Doctor, I wrote down some questions.” I’m in the hospital bed. It’s 7 AM.
“I wrote down some questions.” And I start asking
them. “What about food?”
He answers. “What about drinking?”
He answers. I go, “What about sex?” He says, “What about it?” “I mean, when can
I start?” He says, “Jesus, let me at least leave
the room.” Some people have an amazing
sense of humor. But the fact is, I went back to the second
day of the shoot wearing the same bloody
underwear. Some things you cannot
cancel. I’m a pretty disciplined artist in
that regard. If I can get up and work,
I do my best to do it. It was The Voice,
wasn’t it? And so I’m grateful to you that you’re
here despite the runs. – Because we could…
– That’s the word! Just hit the nail on the head! We could wait a long time for another
chance to talk. That’s truth how she is. In moments like this,
the missis asks me: “Yura, what for? “You don’t even get
sick days.” First off, I’m happy you have
a missis. That means we’re, at the very least, on the same
page on the matter of homosexuality. – You sure?
– Absolutely. No-brainer. As long as the missis you mentioned
really exists. How often do you or people close
to you ask you: What for?
With a stone in your… My older son, Kirill, often
asks me: “Why? Why do you piss your life away, spending days in that trailer?” I tell him: “Son, my dad was from
Central Asia. “Your dad is Dmitry Nagiyev. “Unlike you, I didn’t have
a choice.” So “what for?” is a difficult
question. I can’t answer it at this
moment. I don’t have the time
for shopping. Not a fan of it
either. I don’t go to the theater.
I’m not sociable. That’s why… It’s like I could say a lot of important things
to people on the matter. As many celebrities do. But deep inside, I know:
who am I to do that? It’s not my place to speak
onto people. I think this desire comes from vanity
and nothing else. – So it’s an addiction?
– To be frank… I think so. Yes. I think so. This is the only thing
I’m good at. But then again,
I love this job. I love acting.
I love this work. So… Yes. Have you ever felt that… When you make your deep
inhale, knowing your affliction gets
me worried. So please, do make shorter
inhales. Burning out at work too?
Here’s the best way to recharge. There will be cocks yelling
throughout the ad. Don’t mind them. Domestic tourism. Great choice for a family
weekend. Especially in fall. There are three Russian cities that I believe every
one of you should visit. Serpukhov. One of the prettiest towns of
Moscow Oblast. That’s where they shot the comedy film All at Once,
directed by Roman Karimov, one of the most promising directors
in Russia. Also important to note that it’s the hometown of
our tender editor, Tanechka. Yaroslavl. Concentrated Russian spirit. Beautiful promenade
along Volga. Great hockey events. And the location of last year’s best film,
Boris Khlebnikov’s Arrhythmia. Tula. Since we’re on the subject
of movies, Tula is where Yuri Bykov filmed
The Fool. Though they shot it
at night, and at night, Tula looks like your
bog-standard town. But, first off, they renovated
their kremlin. So now it’s a genuinely great place
for walks. Second, they have a working studio
microphone factory. It had some unused
grounds, so they turned them into
a trendy space with a museum, a library,
and lots of activities like lectures, workshops,
and all that jazz. But what’s the most important thing
about these trips? The most important thing is
the vehicle. Throughout this year, my family and I have been
driving a third-generation Hyundai Santa Fe. This ride is great for both
everyday trips and for going out
of town. But the new, upgraded version
of Santa Fe looks even more alluring for
family getaways. Enhanced room and size. Larger interior and trunk. Plus, now there’s also an extra-spacious
seven-seater version. Updated interior and exterior
design. Sexy LED lights
front and back. Recognizable radiator grille. Inside — improved finishing materials
and a new dashboard. Smart AWD and a new 8-speed transmission
for diesel engines. Special high-tech features
for safety and comfort. Safe vehicle exit and passenger detection
systems. Plus, a windshield
projector, a wide sunroof, and a premium
sound system. Dash through the link
below. All the details are down
there. [Travel Russia] You have a big movie
premiere. Unforgiven, based on
a very… Thank you for remembering.
Yes. Yep. Why did you take
the role? Besides the money? Although this was the rare case when
I only remembered about the money at the end
of the shoot — that they might also pay
me for this. ‘Cause our communication with people
goes like… Rather, my shoots depend on my personal
relationship, first of all, with the director. I either respect or don’t respect them
as a person. Then comes the script.
Then the money. In this sort of descending
hierarchy. And I did like
Sarik Andreasyan — I still struggle with this Armenian
last name of his — as a person. He’s a very smart, receptive,
and cultured person. The whole Andreasyan family
is very cultured. So when he wrote to me at
a late hour: “Dima…” We don’t really talk.
We’re not friends or anything. “Dima, I have a script.
I’d like you to look at it.” I was in the hospital still.
Slowly recovering. He sent me the script,
and I started reading it. As a piece of art,
it was… a real gut-wrenching story. The story itself is gut-wrenching
and disgusting. But here it was also presented
very well. Maybe Andreasyan collaborated with
someone on the script. ‘Cause it was very
well-written. The drama was well-presented.
It hit me hard — the things that I read. I replied to him
immediately. Dmitry, where did your respect to Andreasyan
as a director stem from? – Did you see his previous films?
– No, I said “as a person.” I said “as a person.” Why were you unconcerned about the reputation of
Andreasyan’s previous works? I wasn’t just unconcerned. Mind you, I played in three out of ten
of his shitty films. I have an explanation for everything.
I played in his first film. He called me up. He was but a boy,
like yourself. – You’re 31, right?
– Yes. Yes. He called me and said: “Please. I beg you.
I need your help.” I did, and it was a great
experience. [Sarik Andreasyan’s first film Suckers: Episode One]
[came out in 2009]
I did, and it was a great
experience. [Sarik Andreasyan’s first film Suckers: Episode One]
[came out in 2009]
He had a drunk
camera… [Sarik Andreasyan’s first film Suckers: Episode One]
[came out in 2009]
Everyone who could fool
him, did. Everyone who could fool
him, did. Drunk camera crew. Ours don’t drink. Yours are men
of culture. In shorts. Have you no shame, sitting there
bare-legged? This was his first film.
I played in it. Then he offered the
fat man role. Remember the glued on
prosthetics? Nobody did that
back then. This was before Vysotsky. I broke the mold and played
in this hell that weighed like
26 kilos. We don’t have
a professional industry, and Travolta’s AC’d
body suit is outside our grasp. Where did he play in
an AC’d suit? He played some fat lady
somewhere. – He had an actual AC in it?
– An air-conditioned body suit. – Wow.
– Including all of that, okay? We don’t have that. They spent three hours gluing
it all onto me. I came out on the set, the second director lady said:
“You look great!” Everyone laughed.
She said: “Okay. So lunch first. “Then we’ll shoot a scene
without you. “And then you enter
the shot.” And our wonderful makeup artist
Aleksey said: “You can eat it.
You can masturbate in it. “But in three hours, I’m taking this
thing off.” So we shot the shift in
three hours. Yeah. The sequel was basically
the same role. I played the
fat man twice. I didn’t have the pleasure of working
with Sarik again. What convinced you this movie
wouldn’t be shitty? Besides the actual story? ‘Cause here, the story is… He and I sat down and
discussed it. He also filmed Earthquake afterward,
let’s not forget. – What’s this creaking?
– It’s your chair. Well now. You got the runs.
But I’m the one creaking. I’m very sneaky with it. And I’m grateful to you for it since the first
minute we met today. He made a movie
with Brodie. It wasn’t that good, but it was
still Hollywood. It had Brodie.
I watched parts of it. It was a decent story. Then he made Earthquake. About an earthquake,
imagine that. It was a pretty
powerful film. It felt to me that Sarik was properly
growing as a director. When we met, I realized he had
a very good idea how he’s going to shoot it
scene by scene. – The beard is fake, right?
– Yeah. Why didn’t you grow
your own? I never tried. I was scared of letting down
the whole crew. What if the fucker didn’t
grow? This here is my limit. Well, more or less. Do you agree that it would’ve
looked better… Another important thing. Since you have little
knowledge about filmmaking, I will explain it to you. It’s not hard to grow it. I changed six beards over the course
of one shooting day. The person…
You rent a place and you shoot all its scenes
in a few days. – Today, a year after, and so on.
– Yes. He goes crazy six
years later. It grows out at first.
Then it becomes shorter. At the end of day one, I realized I don’t
wanna be here. I can’t. I just can’t. After they removed the beard for the sixth time
along with bits of my skin. I realized I couldn’t. I wanted to come up
to Sarik and say: “Forgive me. I screwed up.
I’m sorry. Bye.” Day two was a bit
easier. By day 26, the beard kind of grew
on me. I even thought of going home
wearing it. I had a rough time actually. They say: “Go ahead and tell this team of miners
how rough your day was.” But still. I’m just telling you that it was a pretty
unpleasant experience. Have you met
Vitaly Kaloyev? No, I haven’t.
For several reasons. [Kaloyev is a Soviet and Russian architect who was]
[convicted for killing air traffic controller]
[Peter Nielsen]
No, I haven’t. For several reasons. [Kaloyev is a Soviet and Russian architect who was]
[convicted for killing air traffic controller]
[Peter Nielsen]
Which ones? [Kaloyev is a Soviet and Russian architect who was]
[convicted for killing air traffic controller]
[Peter Nielsen]
Reason number one: I didn’t want to. [Kaloyev is a Soviet and Russian architect who was]
[convicted for killing air traffic controller]
[Peter Nielsen]
I had absolutely no desire to. I had absolutely no desire to. I didn’t just not meet him — I never watched any
recordings of his interviews. I watched some briefly,
with my head half-turned, to pick up some of the key
ethnic features, speech and so on. To pick ’em up. But least of all I wanted it to be…
first off, a biopic. I still insist that it’s life-inspired
fiction. Whether it’s good or bad,
it’s fiction. No matter how hard I’d try
to portray Kaloyev, it would still be a parody. Good or bad. So I wasn’t portraying
Vitaly Kaloyev. I was portraying a generalized
character. One I thought up
myself. From there, you can start analyzing how
similar it was to him. Were you ever about to kill
someone? I think in my younger
years… And let’s not forget
the time I grew up in —
not in the… physical sense, but as a person
in the ’90s. Back then, you were always one moment
away from killing someone, one step away, when I was working only gangster venues —
exclusively for gangsters. They owned all the
night clubs. I went through this school
A to Z. I wanted to kill back then.
Today, I don’t. My question was about them,
actually. Was there a moment when you were
working either at a club or elsewhere, or even doing your
dangerous business that eventually led you to
the army where you were close to… No, right before going to the army,
those were simple gainful times when I as a kid, 16 or 17 years old, would run with
Sasha Pushkin, [In his student years, Dmitry was arrested]
[by authorities carrying foreign currency]
[(In the USSR, illegal currency exchange was a felony)]
[To avoid punishment, Dmitry joined the army]
16 or 17 years old, would run with
Sasha Pushkin, [In his student years, Dmitry was arrested]
[by authorities carrying foreign currency]
[(In the USSR, illegal currency exchange was a felony)]
[To avoid punishment, Dmitry joined the army]
scar across his face,
and whoever else. [In his student years, Dmitry was arrested]
[by authorities carrying foreign currency]
[(In the USSR, illegal currency exchange was a felony)]
[To avoid punishment, Dmitry joined the army]
They were just
thugs. [In his student years, Dmitry was arrested]
[by authorities carrying foreign currency]
[(In the USSR, illegal currency exchange was a felony)]
[To avoid punishment, Dmitry joined the army]
Back then, it was clear
who was who. [In his student years, Dmitry was arrested]
[by authorities carrying foreign currency]
[(In the USSR, illegal currency exchange was a felony)]
[To avoid punishment, Dmitry joined the army]
In the ’90s, it got
complicated. In the ’90s, it got
complicated. It got dirty and disgusting. I don’t feel any sort of romantic nostalgia,
recalling those times. Then quickly: did you witness
any killings? I didn’t see anyone
get shot, no. I saw a body fall out of
a trunk once. Like how? Someone would drive up. – Oh, hi, Dima!
– Hey! The trunk opens, and there’s
a body inside. I would turn away to make it look like
I haven’t seen anything. I had those cases.
Gunfire too. They were your partners,
friends… Yes. It was impossible
not to… I never got out of my way to be friends
with them. But I did have pretty warm, respectable
relationships with them. There was no other way.
You either… They either consider you kin or you
work elsewhere. I worked some spots. And I had amicable relationships
with them. What happened to those relationships when
you became a superstar? Does anything from those times
reach today’s life? “Dima, it’s me from ’94.” Immediate urge to please the viewers by saying
that I never became a superstar. And it’s actually true. I don’t feel like one. I’m a very humble, unsociable
person. I’m not one for kitsch. I doubt you saw me at
many parties. – That’s true.
– These things, I… I eschew them.
This was my age test. I eschew them so as not to err.
Just to be thorough there. Waft of new language. Yes, yes. Rowlock. Thill. I forgot what we were
discussing. Do those relations
come back? – Do they pull you back a bit?
– Yeah, so I’m not a superstar. I don’t consider
myself one. Those relations don’t come back —
they never left. Many are behind
bars now. I might give you some
names later. They’re like the actual top of
the criminal world. Behind bars. But again, I never considered
them… I never participated in their dealings
or skirmishes. I only knew them as
people. As people, they were actually
very nice. They said smart things:
“Dimulya… “Weather’s changing. “People are growing.” Phrases like that stick
with you. As an actor,
did you include… Let’s simplify. Did those experiences help
you in Fizruk*?
[*Sitcom about a gangster turned gym teacher] That’s a different thing. I have a brother. The gym teacher is heavily inspired
by Zhenya. He’s a bodybuilder. He quit bodybuilding
a while ago. You know, he… And lastly about those
acquaintances. Do you relay stuff
to prison? To prison? No, no. No. What kind of question is that?
Why would I relay to… Well, if it’s someone… Oh, you mean like
care packages! No, I don’t mean discs with
The Voice. I mean like a box of
cigarettes. “We shot a great episode of
The Voice tonight. “Let’s send it to
prison. “Let the boys sing along.” No. I asked you about the
Miramistin ad. When you were offered to shoot an ad for it,
for the potency pills… – Were they hard decisions?
– It’s not a potency pill. AND the potency pills.
I was listing. Oh, right, that happened. How did you react? “How much again?” Was it an extra zero to
the normal fee? – ‘Normal fee’ for what?
– For a commercial. All the ad campaigns I did
with Miramistin and the pee-pee pills, they were during a crisis of sorts,
right? We’re always one step away
from a crisis, but this was after the sharp decline…
What year was it? – December of 2014.
– ’14, yeah. Everyone was panicking. So when they asked: “Would you like to do
an ad for…” “Would you like to do an ad…”
“I WOULD!” And then you hear
the product. – Right.
– It was more like that. It wasn’t about huge paychecks
at the time. Have you ever used… – Potency medication?
– For potency, yes. When Viagra came along,
of course I tried it. Curiosity. Intrigue. But headache and burning red ears
was all I got from my Viagra experiments. But the topical age is fast
approaching. So if you’ve got some on you,
I’ll gladly accept them. So you were just testing
them out? Of course I was curious.
I was very curious! Is there a commercial that you did and now
feel embarrassed about it? Almost all of them. Obviously.
They’re commercials. That’s why… You walk around, wiping off tears and
trying to convince yourself: “There’s no avoiding it!
(Sobs) “I didn’t grow and study
for this! “But that’s okay. It’s money,
so it’s fine.” It’s almost always
like that. I envy YOU. I saw some
of your commercials. The smiles and laughter when
you’re promoting… I’m stoked about all
our ads! – That’s why I envy you!
– But that’s ’cause we’re very picky. I immediately called MTS and went:
“Give me a script where I’ll laugh in the shot.” I swear, I now will. “Pee-pee pills!
I love it!” Is it true that you disagree
with the saying or the hypothesis
that the army turns boys
into men? I do. Can you explain why? We make conclusions based on our own
memories and experiences. I don’t have other examples,
but the army I knew, the army, as it was
back then, [Nagiyev served near Vologda in the ’80s]
[in air defense forces]
the army, as it was
back then, [Nagiyev served near Vologda in the ’80s]
[in air defense forces]
it damages people
for life. [Nagiyev served near Vologda in the ’80s]
[in air defense forces]
I don’t know how different
it is today. I don’t know how different
it is today. Maybe it’s paradise now, and I would’ve begged
to be in it. But I served my two years
start to finish. What was particularly
damaging? The food.
Seriously, the food. How can you feed that
shit to people? During those years, I’ve probably eaten
20 meters of pickled herring. They boiled it. They soaked it and then
fried it. The frozen potatoes. These things slowly kill
your body. The treatment. I’ve painted kilometers
of lawns. Even though I was a wrestler and,
even in the army, dabbled in sports. They still treated you
like shit. When you talk to guys who served, say,
in the Israeli army, I did recently;
they recall: every day, they had drills,
and training. In their army, you’re not wasting
your time. You’re gaining something. I don’t know what level
we’re at today. I hope our gates are
well-guarded and our soldiers finally get
proper treatment. I hope so. You also faced ethnic issues,
right? – In the army?
– Yes.
– Yeah, I was sent to… Two of us were sent, me and a guy with last name
Zastenchivy*,
[*Lit. “shy”] his demeanor was
appropriate, we two snowballs were
sent to where all the other guys were from
fellow republics. All of them. You mean southern fellow
republics. From southern fellow republics, yes. And basically… It was fine at first. Then they found out I was
a master of sports. [Nagiyev is a master of sports in judo]
[and a USSR sambo champion]
And very few didn’t try
to test it. Master of sports or not, there are few moves against
a swinging stool. Oh, so it wasn’t like
‘let’s test it one on one.’ No! What are you talking about?
Of course not. Of course not. I remember those wonderful
moments. They must have given me
something. When you’re standing on a coal pile that
they chased you to and say: “Don’t be scum.
Let’s go one on one,” and then they all laugh and kick you
into the ground. This must’ve given me
something. That’s me comforting
myself. But likely not. What was the roughest day
in the army? All of them. All of them. Yes. There were episodes, mostly closer
to the end of service, where I got the keys
to the library. Yes. That was in order. I got library keys. I was even allowed to go to the regiment HQ
to pick and choose books. That’s when I started to read.
That’s when my still smooth brain decided to quit LETI, Leningrad Electric
Technology Institute, its sports branch that I left behind
for the army, and join a drama school. There I read and
I wrote… Fucker, you’re creaking so hard
you’re distracting me! Even I heard it.
Andryukha. Creak away.
You’re an artist. – You’re an artist!
– (You need to freeze!)
– That’s your vision of life. – Creak away.
– And so?
– Right. I read, I wrote. I came home from the army with stacks
of my own folios, with some stuff already learned
for entry exams. I knew for certain I was going to
a drama school. I got my papers from LETI and went to the Drama Institute. – I read that…
– Yes? You mentioned that you served with
a guy from an orphanage. – Yeah.
– He managed to set things straight in a
rather original fashion. Yes. After the initiation
beating, he got up at night, broke off a leg
off a stool, and clobbered,
not to death of course, the head ded*.
[*Conscripts in fourth quarter of service] They sent all of us to confinement to peel
potatoes. These guys formed a mob
and came to “talk.” He slashed one with his
knife like this. Then another one’s chest. They never touched him
since. This orphanage upbringing — I lacked that sort of
roughness then. Why am I asking
all this? I’m wondering this
myself! – The movie Purgatory.
– Yes. It came out in the ’90s, but people who saw it remember
it to this day. You gave a very strong and memorable
performance in it. The father of one of the people who used to work
on this show still dislikes you, he actually does, because he remembers
you in that role so well. – He can’t break the connection.
– I did a pretty good job then. And so I thought that after your
experience with the army, you would never don military fatigues,
even in a movie. No. That experience didn’t reach
into such matters. Army was army.
And that’s that. No connection. – What was the shoot like?
– For Purgatory?
– Yes. Aleksandr Glebovich is a man
possessed. [Aleksandr Nevzorov, director of Purgatory (1997)]
He’s driven. In the good sense
of the word. When I asked him: “Why does the shift
start at 6 AM? “Why six? What kind of schedule
is that?” — he didn’t understand the question. He said,
“When else? I feed the horses at five.” If I feed the horses at five,
the shift starts at six. That was perfectly logical
to him. He would take the camera
himself. He would tell the cinematographer:
“Why the hell are you kneeling? Give me that.” He would take the camera,
slide the vomit away, and lie down, and shoot from the ground.
“But there’s vomit!”
“So what? It’s a good shot.” He’s a crazy driven
person. Too bad he’s done
filming. He had a good script afterward
in the works. Crisis started. One of his sponsors either
got shot or arrested. And the show was over. Otherwise, I think he’d still
be making good films. Do you remember your
monologue – …when you’re talking to
the tankman.
– No, I don’t. Well, basically… I remember other things. Because of the cold, we were wearing
women’s pantyhose. It was very cold, so we were wearing
pantyhose under the fatigues. Right after the shoot, I once went to
work at a company party. And my manager at the time, Andrey,
he was a big guy, we’re driving, and he’s also wearing pantyhose,
’cause he spent the day there too, he says, “If we get into an accident
right now… “and they start changing us
in the morgue, “they’ll see we’re both wearing pantyhose
and warm bodysuits.” That’s what I remember.
As for work… You know, there are actors
who carry the roles they love through
their lives and can recite them any time
of the day. I’m not one of those
people. I think nothing is more interesting than
life itself, so I try to forget the things
I do on set and not drag them
along. Nevertheless. You might recall your
feelings at the time. I’ll remind you the scene. It was a very
emotional monologue — it’s a monologue, because the tankman
was silent — where you offer him to join
your side and say: “I’m fighting for this sky, for every
blade of this grass,” and all that, “What do you fight for?” After you read and acted
these lines, what were your thoughts about
the Chechen War? I fear this discussion could
take a while. I will just try to explain to you
that today… Today, I finally have
something… that I thought of and dreamt of
my whole life. I loathe everything
aggression. Everything. I believe that’s the thing I felt
at the time too. I later did a play called The Territory. It was a pretty banal
story that I… we wrote ourselves.
Not I. Linked with a chain, two men escape captivity,
a Chechen, a field commander,
and a Russian guy. They escape. And from hatred,
from literal… from the literal desire to rip each
other’s throats out… We did these things.
We practiced a lot. When we were doing
this play, rooms gave standing ovations or even stood
in silence sometimes. That play was visceral. From this feral hatred that we tried
to portray to the finale, to such love where one carries
the other on his back almost dead. Without the chain. We shut it down
because… there were various
situations. People would sometimes start fighting
in the room. Yes. – Of different ethnicities?
– Yes. We played well.
We played it really well. It was wildly popular. But after 18 months,
we closed it. For our own psychological reasons too.
It was taxing. I don’t want to deal with
aggression anymore, with malice — I just don’t. The actors who played gangsters
in Brother, received “gratitude” from real gangsters
for proper portrayal in the form of gold watches, cars,
and so on. – They showed their respect.
– Been there. Done that. – You had that too?
– Of course! Who and for which
parts? Not for parts. I mean, in general, probably for the parts,
but particularly for the respect. “Dimulya, what are you
wearing?” I had a cheap watch.
I’ve never worn watches. Whatever I had. Whatever caught the eye
on vacation. “Woah, look at that.
It’s got a heart.” “What are you
wearing?” “You know, something.” The next day: “Here. “Wear a proper one.” I go…
It was a Cartier Pasha. Probably 40 or 50 thousand
dollars. I go: “Come now, Roman.
I’d never.” “It’s from the fucking heart.
Don’t be like that.” I said, “No, no! I’d rather you
shot me.” “Do it yourself.” “Thank you.”
And you take it. – Did you wear it?
– They’re around somewhere. I don’t wear watches.
Especially expensive ones. Same with cars.
When I had my car stolen. You know… “Dimulya, can you
come down?” Different guy. I come down. “It’s some assholes. It’s not our boys, Dima.
Some tourists. “We’ll find it.
You just wait.” And they didn’t. I said, “You didn’t.” “Yeah. Here’s some money. “Buy yourself a good car.” “No, no, thank you.” “From the heart, for real.”
“Nah.” “I rather you shot me.” “Do it yourself.” Stuff like that. But you did owe something
in return, right? It’s like Marlon Brando
in Godfather: – “We’ll do you a favor…”
– I did, yes. But remember what
he said? “You never offered me your
friendship.” I did offer my friendship and didn’t hide that
I knew them. I readily came to their celebrations
or whatever and even hosted some. I honestly considered these people
my friends. Big friends. And their biographies didn’t
bother you? Their lifestyle bothered me. But nothing about how they treated me
bothered me, no. These people, when they hate you…
I learned that side too. Our dear viewers probably don’t even
want to know these things. I had that too, where someone told me,
“I’m gonna fucking rip your kidneys out.” All the way up to respectful and amicable
relationships. Did you get any reactions from Chechens for
your part in Purgatory? Positive or negative. You know, I… No. Definitely no negative ones. You know, I treat… Another age test. I’m equally indifferent to
praise and besmirching. I don’t linger on these
things. So whatever happened,
happened. “Besmirch.”
Another one for you. – And “linger.”
– “Linger” too, yeah. Thank you. Oh yeah. “Linger.”
I never realized. – I loathe all forms of aggression, you said.
– Yes. Do you loathe the cartoon about the rockets
capable of reaching Florida too? I haven’t seen it, but yes.
I think I would. It rings a bell. Yes. I don’t get it. Same with the slogan
“To Berlin.” Same with the slogan
“Can go for round two.” I’m like, what’s that?
What IS that? Who do you think you are, you piece of shit,
that you want a round two? I remember going to Victory Day
celebrations with my grandpa, where these old men would
drink in silence, yeah… Saying but one thing:
“To no more wars.” And they’d drink. And here you are, you asshole,
with “To Berlin” on your car. ” ’41-’45 Can go for round two.” What’s wrong with you? What’s cinema’s allure? I, explain to me as
someone… The fairy tale. I think about it and go:
goodness! Take Kaloyev. I look at myself
on the screen: it’s a character. I’m giving an interview right next to it wearing
the same makeup — I’m Nagiyev. Same beard, same everything —
Nagiyev. Up there — a character. It’s like: Wow! It’s mystical.
A fairy tale. So the fact that it’s a dream land,
that you’re creating it. World of illusions. All art is
world of illusions. That’s why I like it so much. And I try to uphold this illusion in
my communication. I try to maintain the boundary between
myself and the viewer not because of
arrogance, but because I’m helping the viewer preserve
this sense of illusion and perception of me as an actor,
as a character on the screen. Is The Voice the best show you’ve
ever hosted? I’m afraid of appearing
too smart. Though that might not
be a risk. I don’t care what show I’m
hosting. I’ve always worked and gave it my all
on all of them. I think The Voice is the most festive,
most cheerful, most unusual of them. It’s what was missing, in the whole
scheme of things. I like the presentation.
I like the style that’s expressed in every
part of it: decorations, lighting, joy. I love the fact that our Western colleagues
don’t let us deviate. That’s very important too, ’cause at first, we didn’t know
how shit’s done. Remember the show
Two Stars? I think I was the only person to host
Two Stars for three years. That’s where this whole
comeback started… as discussed by the
Bolsheviks*.
[*Soviet expression] Early on on The Voice, I’d run out
on stage and go: “Why didn’t you turn
around? “How could you? Look, he’s missing
two fingers!” Our guys would say:
“Our bad.” I hit the button. “Me too!”
The foreigners… came out and said:
“If you run out on stage again, “we’re packing this shit up
and leaving.” – So the foreigners are supervising right
there behind curtains?
– Yes. We would’ve squandered it all on
our cordiality. You know? On our endless
blabbing. Now we keep a pace. And now I understand
what they meant. We keep the pace, and so it goes
boom, boom, boom. And the numbers are
impressive. There’s Coke.
There’s Coke right? And you know that if you
don’t put… Local guys tried it at
one point. “Why put so much
sugar in? “Let’s put two bags fewer.” The machine stops
immediately. These guys are making
Coke. You can’t get in the way. You can add your own
color to it, but you have to preserve the pace
and the format. That’s the proper way. That’s why their
shows run year after year, while here, season three —
it’s unbearable to watch. There used to be a show called
The Big Race. It had running with bulls
and stuff. It’s a show! Bulls picking people
up with horns! It was dangerous! I timed it: out of a 90 minute episode,
only 12 were contests. Twelve minutes of
contests. Rest was foreplay? Foreplay happens
in sex. There, it was fucking
blather. Just endless hooey about life,
about… “What songs did you sing?”
Then a cutoff to him. I’ve always tried to talk
with flare to get at least some
phrases funny, or clever, or dumb
make the cut. But endless talking kills shows,
in my opinion. This pseudocordiality that not all shows
necessarily need. Or in fact, usually don’t. You want spectacle, action,
fanfare, and cleverness of
what’s shown. Unless it’s
What? Where? When?*
[*Paced intellectual game show] And even there… – You love saying:
“As my grandad used to say”.
– Yeah? Are any of those
real? Unfortunately, almost none. I think the general view on life and
sense of humor I got from my grandad —
among others, but most of those
“quotes” are made up, arrived at at nights, stolen, repurposed. It’s preparation. I don’t get a script, so it’s up to me to…
as well as I can. “We not y’all academic folk,”
as they say. “We do to our ‘standin’.” So everything you hear,
that’s all me. You said you were strongly against hosting
The Voice: Kids. What about
The Voice: 60+? For The Voice: Kids, I did tearfully beg
the management on the floor. As for 60+, I had major
doubts, which, to my great pleasure,
quickly evaporated, because they’re such smart, cultured people
with life’s worth of knowledge, great education and
great experience, absolutely zero pretense, absolutely zero. At some points… I marveled at times. There was this
71-year-old man: upright, handsome,
toned. Beside him, a 29-year-old wife
and a year-old child. You could argue how right
or wrong it is, but I was standing there,
thinking: “What do you shoot,
you bastard? “I wanna…Shoot me up with
what he’s having.” And then you have those characters:
(In exaggerated, nasal, elderly voice)
“This here’s bread. “I baked this bread myself.
Good for the health. “This bread is good
for you. “And you got eggs, and this nastoika* is very
good for your health.”
[*Traditional 40-45% alcohol tincture] He’s bearded, hairy, gray,
toothless. “This here tincture is very good for
your health!” – “And how old are you?”
– “Oh! I’m 56 already!” [Dmitry Nagiyev is 51]
And you’re thinking: do you even realize
you’re killing yourself? And you’re thinking: do you even realize
you’re killing yourself? Did it concern you that
The Voice: 60+ came out right as the pension
reform hit? When all the state
media started yapping that being
old is fine, and live, and work,
and bla-bla. We had the shows
directors over before the shoot. “We came up with 60+
18 months ago! “We were developing, getting funding,
writing it.” “It’s not tied to the pension reform
in any way!” I can honestly and officially tell you right now
that it’s pure coincidence. Just pure coincidence. Tell you more, I haven’t mentioned it a single
time on the show. More so, it was -recommended- by the heads to never
mention that message. It’s a show designed to entertain and offer
positivity without involving politics. How do you feel about the
pension reform? My feelings about it are
two-fold. On the one hand, the pension age recently adopted
in our country is the same as in most
civilized countries. There’s no other way. We’re becoming
so many that it’s getting ever harder to feed
every mouth. And there’s probably no
other way. This is how I understand it from
the standpoint of the state — there’s no other way. From the human standpoint, if my grandma’s
pension age had been, what? —
sixty-three or sixty? [Women – 60 y.o.]
[Men – 65 y.o.]
– It’s 60 now.
– Yeah, 60. [Women – 60 y.o.]
[Men – 65 y.o.]
If it had been
sixty, If it had been
sixty, I wouldn’t’ve gotten to eat
grandma’s pirozhki, I wouldn’t’ve gathered raspberries
holding her hand, when back in Sestroretsk, she’d gather
those raspberries and give them
to a little me. I would’ve missed
that. If my grandpa had
worked to 67, he wouldn’t have taught me
to ride a bicycle. I would’ve never experienced those
things in my life, to my greatest regret. So from a human
standpoint, it’s unbelievably distressing
to acknowledge that from now on, it’s going to be
the new norm. Again, from the standpoint
of the state, in foreign countries,
people work and live decent lives thanks
to good salaries and then retire
with dignity and can, as it’s been discussed
many times, live, and travel, and grow hortensias
in their own little gardens. Another word for
your list. – Nah. Hortensias are fine.
– Hortensias. Yes. Biology. Here, you toil away your whole
goddamn life and then retire to a pension
of 13-14 thousand*.
[*$200-215 in June 2019] Though some people in the recent
address said fourteen, looks like it’s going to be thirteen-
something after all. Thirteen thousand! In dollars that’s, correct me
if I’m wrong… Less than 200. A little over 200. That’s a shameful
number too embarrassing to even
mention. That’s why adopting
this age, this age bracket, in this country is a tough pill to swallow. There was an episode of Okna where pretty much
everyone was getting fucked up. – You got some too.
– Aha. Who came up with that?
And were you talked into it? Komissarov.
That was… A State Duma deputy! Alcoholism overlaid on childhood
fantasies and this happened — he came
up with Okna. Okna is basically where
it all started. All the TV fighting. When they canceled Okna, I had taken out a bunch
of loans — I really wanted to live in
Moscow. My contract was to last another year,
so I estimated how much I’d approximately make
in that year. Took out some loans. And they canceled the show.
That was a shocker. But that same day I got a call from
Channel One: “Good day. “You’re being summoned
to K… “If you have the time, could you come down
to talk to Konstantin Ernst*?”
[*CEO of Channel One] I said: “Let me see when I’ll be
available…” They said: “You’ll be available today
at 4 PM.” So I came down. I didn’t know — nobody knew — that Okna
was being canceled. He learned it, and an hour later,
I got a call. I went in and said:
“Good day.” We’d never met. “You’re a very talented
person…” “You’re a VERY talented
person. “You’ve been working very hard these
past three years “and have masterfully crafted the perfect
goblin persona.” – “Goblin?”
– Yes. “Welcome aboard.” That’s how I got on
Channel One. The episode where you get punched,
was that set up? Of course, it was set up
and rehearsed. There was a capsule with artificial blood hidden under
the bed. When they smacked me in
the chest and I fell on this bed, the capsule
rolled away! The actors are picking me up,
as per script, while I’m still desperately
looking for it. And in the last minute,
as they’re dragging me away,
I find and pop it into my mouth. Voila — blood. Aha. If you see it today… – …are you more likely to laugh?
– It’s in reruns. It’s there in reruns. I try to… I’m too embarrassed
to watch it. It’s in reruns, of course.
Okna is syndicated to channel… TV is legit spooky. It’s on Shit-Channel Two
or something. I stumbled upon it. No. I didn’t watch the show
back then either. – In 2014, at the season
finale of the Voice…
– Yeah. …and there were two
situations. First, I heard you say:
“I’m saying goodbye to you all.” – “I’m saying goodbye to you all.”
– Yes. – “GOOD. BYE.”
– Yes. I interpreted that as
“I’m not hosting the next season.” And then Konstantin Ernst says that
the judges are going. – “You’re demobilized.”
– I even teared up. “Zhilin and Nagiyev,
your term continues.” I don’t get it.
How do the two mesh? What did your farewell
mean? I said my farewells. I can’t recall, but they purchased
the franchise for either one or two seasons. I can’t recall what season that was,
first or second. I said my farewells how I imagined it,
how I wrote it for myself. I thanked everyone for the time
we shared. I changed my opinions on a lot
of the judges — I warmed up to some,
better understood others, had issues with
others still, but I honestly said my farewells at the end
and even teared up, and then Konstantin Lvovich
crawled out on the stage and said: “Where are YOU going?
You’re doing the whole nine yards. “So — get back in there.” So you truly thought you
wouldn’t return? I work– I serve on
Channel One. With them, expecting that you’ll stay on
tomorrow is completely pointless. So I just do my job with uniform diligence. That doesn’t mean the results are
always the same, but I’ll give it my all on season nine
like I did on season one. I try. The rest is up to them. What I gained after all these years:
I’m not afraid anymore to be kicked out. I no longer have
that fear. Ten or fifteen years ago, I grabbed onto
things and trembled. Today I’m calm. Not because of some
savings. I just try to stay calm. If all else fails, I’ll start a YouTube channel
and do interviews with popular celebrities,
with rappers… with various shitheads too. When did this fear leave?
Did something happen? Did some switch turn? No, I think it was the click that Tatiana
Vasilyeva once mentioned to me, when we were in
Praporshchik Zadov. I was lucky: in the last season,
we had her on, as well as Liuba Polishchuk
and Liusya Gurchenko, as I was allowed
to call her. During one of the lunch
breaks when we were eating the TV chow from
those troughs, we got to talking. And Tania said that after 45,
you get this click, and your brain starts accumulating
wisdom exponentially. Before that, she said, don’t believe
what they say. Before that, there’s no hint of wisdom
in your head. After 45, it starts going. You MAY get this click. I’m an actor.
I can switch to stage. I can work with combination
companies. I can do nothing. You hosted The Voice live minutes or hours
after learning that your mother died. Yes. – How is that possible?
– It’s horrible. I landed. I came to shoot The Voice.
The shoot was at 2 PM. Final rehearsal
at 2 PM. Then a 1-hour break. And we’re going live. At 2 PM I need to join
the rehearsal. I landed, and my brother called me and said:
“Dima, bad news. Mom died.” And I rehearse in that condition. Then, as you might imagine, the 1-hour
break makes it worse — when you stay alone in your
trailer and you sit and simmer in your
thoughts. And then you go live. Heavy story. That’s related to the way you
and I work: the viewer doesn’t care, nor SHOULD they know
what’s up with you. You have a job to do. I used to…
I used to have a disturbed view of
the situation — as did all the ordinary
people — I had a disturbed view of
the situation when Schwarzenegger didn’t go
to his dad’s funeral. “How could you? “He’s your dad!” I was close to that. Close to that. Honestly. Can you tell one
thing — one or more,
if you want to — that your mom
taught you? My mom? Mom was a wise person. It’s only now that we have a warm
relationship with our dad. After mom died, my brother and I obviously
started calling dad every day. “How are you?” He said, “You gonna bug the crap
outta ME now?” With mom, I always had this
cordial closeness. She’s a very smart
person. I remember walking with my mom once,
after meeting her at a subway exit. I was a grown-up already,
seventeen-ish. We were walking from
the subway. She used to teach at the
Signal Corps Academy. We were walking and talking, and she asked:
“How are things with Olya?” I said: “Mom, it’s great! “So many new and
unusual things! “I’m having so much fun!” She stopped and said:
“Dimochka. “You have to “live your life to make HER
feel good first, “and then, if there’s extra room,
to make YOU feel good.” I carried that advice through
my life. I still do my best
to adhere to it. Obviously, age leaves
a mark. Sometimes, you wanna yawn, fart,
and fall asleep. But no, I recall what
mom said. I use all my remaining energy
to make her feel good. You were on
Prozharka*.
[*Comedy roast] – The first one that didn’t go anywhere.
– Yeah, it fell flat. – First of all…
– They shot two in a row. The first one was with
Shnurov. They just showed it
second, huh? I mean… Yes. How was it? – I liked…
– Were you suffering or
enjoying yourself? It was hard to tell by the
impression on your face. If you couldn’t tell,
that’s probably about right. I couldn’t tell
either. I would’ve probably gotten into it
if we made more episodes. They offered me to host
the show, ’cause they had issues with
the original host. They summoned me and said:
you’re gonna host it. Then Ernst decided to close
shop entirely. He probably wasn’t happy with
the amount of complaints? No. It’s just that the range
of jokes permitted at a comedy roast on
Channel One is limited. They can’t be too
hardcore, but they should be, and I insisted on
them being hardcore. When they sent me jokes
about me, I didn’t cross anything out.
I think that if you agreed to that sort
of thing, you need to go balls
to the wall. They sent you jokes
beforehand? They sent me some, asking:
what do you think? Too much? Not all of them,
but some. Ones about Larisa Guzeyeva,
’cause they’re pretty personal. By the way,
after that Prozharka, I had a question: were you and Guzeyeva
together at some point? Well, she used to be
a megastar. A superstar. She skyrocketed
to fame after the Romance film.
What’s it called? – “Cruel.”
– “A Cruel Romance.” I was a student.
A fledgling student. Second year or
something. And suddenly
the institute — we were sitting on stairs
next to our classroom, as usual, smoking,
eating rusks — and the institute began
to buzz: “Guzeyeva! Guzeyeva!”
And there she was. She studied a few years prior with
the same teacher as me. She was coming up the stairs,
an absolutely mesmerizing beauty, with some popular Russian-born
American director. We went: “Hello…” She said:
“This is where I studied.” Larisa always loved
to posture. “Yes, I studied here.
This is my Alma Mater.” Later that evening, I was walking home along
Nevsky Prospect to Mayakovskaya station. And she’s walking. The entire Nevsky
kind of pauses. I’m walking,
and she’s walking. As I pass by, I go,
“Good evening!” She goes, “Petrovitz!*”
[*Actually, Petrov] Our teacher,
Vladimir Viktorovich. “Petrovitz!
Come along.” The director was visibly displeased
by this turn of events. Probably her lover. I said,
“Where are we going?” “To the Journalist House.” Getting into Journalist House was even cooler
than getting into Actor House. They had this
restaurant. So I trailed along. Of all things,
I got drunk. That was normal for
Larisa too. She goes: “Dimych*, look!
My pantyhose caught on something.”
[*A close buddy form of “Dima”] I said, “Then let’s fucking…
take them off!” In the middle of
the restaurant. Then there was commotion.
They threw me out. And things went from
there. Did you end up
together? It was… a splash. – Last subject.
– Your phone is so ugly. Why is it red?
What does it say? It says:
“Punk under my skin.” Jesus. You’re a grown mister,
Yuri Aleksandrovich. Best VK quote. What’s the translation? You really need
a translation? “Punk under my skin.” – Punk?..
– …under my skin. – It’s actually merch from a bar in Piter,
your home city, on Rubinstein street.
– (Goodnes gracious.) When I read your comments about what’s
going on around us… – …in our country…
– Read where? – In your interviews.
– Oh, in MY interviews. …I get the impression that you’re not happy
about A LOT of things. This impression, as much as I tried
to hide and conceal it*,
[*Dmitry is being sarcastic] it’s probably not
baseless. You know, as a human being,
I’m a patriot. I’m… thankful,
and I love the place I’m at. I was born here. All my ancestors are from elsewhere,
from Iran. My grandma is German. But we were born here, for which I’m grateful,
and I love my homeland. Some things… You know, the greater your love, the more questions the present evokes in you. The more indignant you
become or more perplexed —
at the very least. Let’s go back to the moment
when I said that I loathe everything
aggression, so I try to avoid those
words. “I hate.” “I despise.”
“I would destroy.” Indignation.
Let’s call it that. – Some matters do make me
perplexed and indignant.
– For example? I believe we need to become
a civilized country. We have to. Thus, no matter your track record,
if you have one, and your accomplishments,
if you have any, you can’t run for… you-know-which office, or any other,
as many times as you want. You can’t do that. Regardless of
who you are. You’re a human being,
liable to pulls and temptations. No matter how righteous
you are, over time, you grow
accustomed to connections, nepotism,
favoritism, which defies proper
governance and freedom of will
and action. You can’t have that. It’s said — it was in our Constitution too,
wasn’t it? — how many times you can hold
the office. But then it turned out it said
“in a row” at the end, and the whole idea turns
on its head. So I believe you can’t hold the office
as many times as you please. No matter your
qualities. There are other
issues that gnaw at me
inside, but that doesn’t mean I’m going to go
to storm the barricades, because I don’t think I support
the other side either. I feel like they’re also driven by personal
ambitions of some sort. This is my answer. Your quote that sent chills
down my spine. With how sweaty my armpits are,
you’ve just whacked me good. – “We’re slowly but surely becoming
North Korea.” Did I say that?! Yuri Aleksandrovich,
you’re drowning yourself and trying to drag ME into
the same deep. The things we say
in jest! I joked — you laughed. I must’ve confused something
in that quote. Though the trends
are there. Let’s be honest — 
the trends are there. If you open up some of the
news websites today, the headlines you’ll see are truly hysterical laughter-
worthy. “Our leader drove America
under the bench.” Why do you…
Why do you write this? In order to — what? What for? Who drove whom
where? Why do you have to drive someone
somewhere? Things like that, I mean, I don’t fully understand,
to put it mildly. I heard you crossed paths with Putin
back in the ’90s. Where and on what… We didn’t just
cross paths. I had the pleasure of working
beside him. I was in charge of… I used to be the most popular DJ.
Yep. I received the Man of the Year award
in Piter four times. And suddenly became the most popular
radio DJ in Russia. And I got — given the times —
dragged into the second-term campaign for Anatoly Aleksandrovich
Sobchak. I was in charge of… Well, that’s what they told me. In reality,
I wasn’t in charge of anything. Except for my chamber pot. But they said I was
in charge of the Youth Movement Team
for Sobhack’s re-election. And so we campaigned through towns
and villages. We actually did some good things.
We handed out — chow was scarce —
food rations, presents, veteran packages,
buckwheat. We drove around in a PAZ.
Literally, a PAZ. It was new and tidy, but it wasn’t a swanky
Mercedes with tinted windows. It was a simple PAZ. – Not even an Ikarus?
– Not even. Just a PAZ —
small, agile. I actually saw Sobchak outside
many times. Sitting in a car. Not in a VAZ,
but you know? I saw him napping like that
many times. He made use of that. There were no crazy car corteges,
like today. He rode shotgun in the PAZ,
deep in thought. I rode behind him. Can’t say that was
always by accident. No, that was pre-planned. I thought that was better seating
in our circumstances. He was there.
I was here, staring into the gray on the
back of his head. Behind me,
sat Vladimir Vladimirovich (Putin). He would occasionally
tap me to ask: “Dima, did you have enough “buckwheat, canned meat,
sugar?” And I would reply very concisely:
“Yes, yes. Thank you.” Moron. “Yes, yes.” Instead of a proper answer — 
“yes, yes.” What kind of a conversation
is that? But, you know, if only I saw
the future. Then what? You would’ve used
your silver tongue? – Of course!
– Tried to become friends? Of course! I would’ve turned
to face him. I kid probably.
I kid. I never tried to and I never really learned to be friends
with the right people. But you I like,
Yuri Aleksandrovich. Mother of God. When was the last time
you met Putin? Was it after he became
president? People would occasionally tell me
he said hi. I recently met him in
Kremlin. For the KVN* anniversary,
I read
[*Long-running comedy contest show] a little poem that I wrote
on the way. The powers that be didn’t really
appreciate my poem. Do you remember it? Everyone, KVN is fifty-five Everyone, KVN is 55
I’m almost as old as it Everyone, KVN is 55
I’m almost as old as it
Only it’s doing just fine Everyone, KVN is 55
I’m almost as old as it
Only it’s doing just fine
I’m for some reason in… But above us — Vladimir Vladimirovich But above us — Vladimir Vladimirovich
Looking down as we float along But above us — Vladimir Vladimirovich
Looking down as we float along
We don’t sink, Vladimir Vladimirovich But above us — Vladimir Vladimirovich
Looking down as we float along
We don’t sink*, Vladimir Vladimirovich
‘Cause our lives are a joyful song
[*Nod to the Russian expression “shit doesn’t sink”] Originally, it said:
“We don’t sink, our emperor.” But in the last moment,
as I was reading it, I decided to change
this line. I can’t say that everyone was
overjoyed. Did Maslyakov* cough?
[*Creator and life-long host of KVN] Or was he silent? – No, he didn’t cough.
– Did he laugh? Calm. Pale. Stood holding
his breath. Then said: “You… done, new Karamzin?” And Putin? Can I not answer? They immediately
invited me. Immediately invited me.
Without any… Invited where? – Lubyanka?*
– No. To talk.
[* Infamous FSB building] It was in Kremlin. They didn’t say a word
about it. I later saw they made edits
and cuts. I don’t believe such big and strong
authority should fear things. I figure: if you’re big and strong,
don’t be scared. If you’re in the right. Otherwise, yeah,
you should edit out poems. In the last season of Fizruk,
you worked with Viktor Sukhorukov. – Yeah.
– Was it special? Vitya is a virtuoso. Some things the
people… of his category, I place him with
the old guard, even though he looks
amazing, are not too prepared for. Particularly, the pace of things
happening on the set. It’s the amount you need
to shoot in a given time. They’re used to being able to work
with the script. Churikova used to have the same
approach on our show. She’d rehearse,
look into it, mumble to herself. The pacing of the process is a little
different now. You need to shoot
a lot, fast. Nine minutes.
Submitted. You then think
of the happy times when they took three and a half years to make
Shadows Disappear at Noon*.
[*7-episode miniseries. ~70-minute episodes] You used to be able to work
with the script, to mould it. We don’t have that. This is, unfortunately, the damn distinctive
feature of today’s industry. Does it make movies
worse? Yes. Of course.
Definitely. On Nikita Mikhalkov’s
best films they had a rehearsal period, a month,
they’d gather, read lines. It’s probably important. We, young people, you and I, we work in a different
environment. Flash quiz! I’ll ask quick questions… Right! Okay!
Armpits are sweaty already. – You good? Let’s go!
– I’m camouflaged. You’re wet in a different
spot today. Okay, Yuri! Let’s go! – You ready?
– I don’t smell, do I? Come on! Not to drag you along to the bottom,
I’ll say: no, you don’t. What would you give your life for
without hesitating? Without hesitating —
for my kids and for my beloved. For my kids
and for my beloved — now, I think, I wouldn’t
hesitate. How many kids
do you have? Screw you,
Yuri Aleksandrovich. I would’ve never asked
this question, if you hadn’t called Kirill your OLDER
son during this interview. I did? What a moron. Rewind. My older son, Kirill, often
asks me… You know, I don’t talk about my private
life for a different reason. I chose this life myself. I don’t know what they’ll choose.
I don’t want to… Next. Money or conscience? I don’t want to disappoint
the two fans I have, so I’ll say: conscience. Although I do think there
are situations where reality can tilt
the scales. Did you have those? Not recently,
I don’t think. But I recall the time I wore
a banana costume at a company party. It’s not even like
I was starving. At a company party!
In a banana costume! Wearing shorts.
A banana in shorts. I was crying. I almost threw the money
back to them. A banana costume! ‘Cause it was a banana
company, and they wanted me to do
a solo scene. I stood there in a banana
costume. There were times. – Not anymore.
– Was that in the aughts? Not even aughts! Though no,
that’s about right. – It wasn’t in ancient times.
– What’s so embarrassing? – That was funny. You’re a master
of comedy.
– No, you misunderstand. I’m all for making people
laugh as a character — 
on stage or on screen. As Dima Nagiyev,
I don’t want to be funny. And here it’s fucking Nagiyev!
In a banana costume! Plus, it was too big. So the top was hanging like this
in front of me. – Like a limp dick.
– Yes. Like a limp dick. Why did you say that? I heard in an interview that you
have a small dick. – And couldn’t sleep tonight.
– In which one? You told one of your guests
out of the blue. They didn’t even ask you!
That was so moronic. In the middle of the conversation
you just went:
“I have a small dick.” “And I have a small dick. Okay.” I thought: “What’s the point of me
having this information,
Yuri Aleksandrovich?” Why mention it? – Did you watch it at night?
– Probably. Before bed. I said: “LET’S SAY
I have a small dick.” No, you didn’t. The Internet remembers. Good sex or
a good steak? Good sex. Although… sometimes it’s… As Jack Nicholson said: “Finally, all I want
before bed, is to read a book.” So far, for me sex beats a steak. But it’s time I grabbed hold
of myself. A business you invested in
that now brings dough? I don’t have one. I really enjoy helping
my brother, who operates a chain of small
mini-hotels called Blues. Next one. Promoting Viagra
or the pension reform? Viagra. Duh. Obviously. When you stand before Vladimir Putin
next time, what will you
tell him? “Is 15 centimeters too cruel
a punishment?” Ivleyeva’s interview made
an impression on you. Ivleyeva’s interview didn’t.
Your sudden confession did. Isn’t it weird?
You did so many interviews, but all I remember from your artistic portfolio
is the small dick story. How longeth? While we were setting up,
I learned that you know
about Danila Poperechnyi. Where from? This is the present day,
be it damned, of our reality. So… how else? You’re gonna laugh your
nuts off, but I also listen to
Oxxxymiron. – You listen to him?
– I am aware, let’s say. It’s not the stuff I listen to in my car
or on a treadmill, but I at least understand
and can tell them apart. I have my opinions on all
the rappers. – An on Poperechnyi too.
– What do you think?
Do you like him? He’s said some very
accurate things, but they were probably poignant
and accurate before they told
him off that he jokes about politics
too much. He was poignant there. Not all of it was funny,
but at least a lot of it
came from the heart. Now, there’s a risk
he’ll devolve. There is a risk. Although he’s a talented person, who,
probably, can adapt to any situation. I mean, what ruins us? The conveyor.
Mass production. – Are you doing another
interview today?
– No. And yet, you’re already
in mass production. It used to be a standout and probably
coveted happenstance for artists to get on Dud’s show,
because it used to be very exclusive, selective, and, again, for few.
Nowadays… After I had Nagiyev on,
it’s clear ANYONE could get here. You turned it to shit. Yes. It’s hard to compete…
Is that your bicycle? – No.
– Don’t tell me you ride
that thing. – No, no.
– Right. You have a conveyor going.
You’re done. Me being here means you’ve got
only third-rate guests left. You’ll have to change
things around. Same happened to
Praporshchik Zadov. People used to laugh. We got into the Guinness Book
of Records. The numbers were
absolutely crazy. Then it went into mass production,
and we made 350 episodes. There were still masterpieces.
Real gems. But they were few
and far between. That was
the conveyor. This happens to everything
and everyone. As soon as you start mass-producing,
you’re done. Contest. What will be your gift
to our viewers? Because you didn’t tell me
in advance… – I’ll attribute it to…
– …localized soreness. To your illness, yes. A pair of glasses. I’ll give them to you or drop
them off somewhere. I have a small… – Sunglasses?
– Yes. Ones I wear. Contest. Today we learned that Dmitry’s famous
“as my grandad used to tell me” is an artistic device in his
performances. But almost all of us had grandads
in our lives who said things that became aphorisms, and we can share said
aphorisms. Write in the comments something
cool or fun that you learned
from your grandad. The most awesome
and snappy phrase or advice will get
this prize. Yeah. I’m all for it. – Thank you, Dmitry.
– Thank you, Yuri. It’s a pleasure to talk to a smart
and cultured person.

100 thoughts on “Нагиев – пенсии, стих в Кремле (English subs)

  1. Кое-что из внутренностей:

    0:51 У Нагиева пошел камень во время съемок. Что делать при таком графике?
    4:17 Ради чего это все?
    6:05 Путешествие по России. Куда отправиться?
    8:40 Почему Дмитрий играет у Сарика Андреасяна?
    16:03 «Вы были близки к тому, чтобы убить человека?»
    17:24 «При вас убивали?»
    19:49 С кого Дмитрий взял образ Физрука?
    20:48 Нагиев рекламировал средство от потенции. Было ли ему неловко?
    23:12 Про ад в армии, драки и дедовщину
    28:18 Холод, грязь, колготки. Как снимали «Чистилище»?
    31:03 Отношение к чеченской войне
    33:32 Какие подгоны бандиты делали Нагиеву?
    36:51 «Кто ты такой, кусок говна, что хочет войну повторить?»
    37:43 Почему Нагиева манит актерская деятельность?
    38:40 Все про «Голос»
    44:56 «Голос 60+» — связан проект с пенсионной реформой?
    46:05 Какой отношение к пенсионной реформе?
    48:51 «Окна» и фальшивые драки
    55:03 Нагиев вёл прямой эфир «Голоса» когда умерла мама. Как он себя чувствовал?
    56:22 Какой важной штуке научила мама?
    57:47 Почему закрыли «Прожарку»?
    59:11 Что было между ними с Гузеевой?
    1:01:15 Нагиев троллит Дудя
    1:01:39 Что Дмитрия не устраивает в современной России?
    1:03:07 «Нельзя баллотироваться сколько хочешь раз». Нагиев объясняет, почему нужна сменяемость власти
    1:05:58 В 90-е Дмитрий общался с Собчаком и Путиным. Как он об этом вспоминает?
    1:08:40 Какой стих Нагиев посвятил Путину?
    1:10:42 В чем отличие старой актерской школы от новой?
    1:12:21 Блиц!
    1:12:50 Сколько детей у Дмитрия?
    1:13:22 За какой корпоратив ему стыдно?
    1:15:24 Секс или стейк?
    1:16:09 Оказавшись перед Путиным
    1:16:48 О стендапах Поперечного
    1:19:32 Конкурс!

  2. Раньше мне казалось, что Нагиев напыщенный, какой-то скользкий тип. А сейчас увидела человека умного, трепетного, с большим чувством юмора, любящего и сильного. Очень понравилась беседа.
    Хочется сказать спасибо Юрию. Гениально.

  3. Нагиев зачем крутиш жопой некрасиво пукаеш нюхаеш и прекрасно ты же не тот за кого себя выдаеш

  4. когда я ломал что-то, дед говорил ( тебе дать хуй, стеклянный ты и хуй сломаешь и руки порежишь, потому что-то у тебя руки под хуй заточены ) ахахахахаха

  5. Почему в очках ? В глаза смотреть надо ! А ты не можешь, потому что говоришь не то , что хотел бы. Не надо бояться Дмитрий , начни говорить правду, пока не откликнулось!

  6. про Невзорова очень интересно сказал, ещё больше зауважал Александра Глебовича посмотрев это интервью!

  7. все диманы по ходу одинаковые: " я напился там. .меня выкинули оттуда" ахахах я также всегда делаю!

  8. а пайки вы спижженые из армии раздавли если что.. стрёмно за такое должно быть! пыня ещё тогда в распиле учасвтовал!

  9. Дмитрий, спасибо вам за ваше творчество, росла на сериале Каменская, обожаю вас

  10. Очень крутое интервью! Спасибо!!!
    Я местами очень смеялась))
    Только какие-то уроды за дверью лазили и отвлекали

  11. Нагиев немного разочаровал какойто гнильцой в душе. Один хороший актер уже пытается рулить соседней территорией и пока както не очень. Каждый должен делать свое дело а не подпёздывать другим, в делах которого не разбираешься. Он Сам участвовал в инструментах массовой дебилизации страны в различных дебильных шоу, навязывая и воспитывая чисто потребительское качество, по запсдному образцу, убивая наше исконное сострадание и широту души (сам это только что сказал про шоу голос) и называть при этом себя патриотом, обсирая власть. Тьфу. И дрышь тоже такое же гавно, даже не знаю чо вы его смотрите, это ж пропогандон пилящий напильником устои нашей страны.

  12. мне кажется или он послушал музыку перед интервью? =) зубками так характерно стучит иногда…)

  13. Пересмотрел еще раз с большим удовольствием ровно через год.!!! На одном дыхании.. Душевно))) Респект команде!

  14. нагиев-отталкивающий человек. хотя жизнь нелегкая у него была, но все равно, симпатии никогда не вызывал.

  15. Я разочарован в Нагиеве: человек существующей системы, много вымысла, попытка себя обелить. Мое мнение..

  16. Про еду в армии, наверное мы служили с Нагиевым в одной части )))
    Засоленная рыба во всех блюдах …

  17. Дмитрий! А что заикаться стали при вопросе о "пенсионной реформе"? Стыдно и страшно правду сказать?

  18. Всегда была уверенна, несмотря на Димины роли, что он умен, интелегентен, воспитан и человек с большой буквы!

  19. Думаю ніколи не візьме у мене інтерв'ю Дудь. Але я, мабуть, відповідав би так. Діма так і не наважився озвучити, що він соціопат.

  20. Да реклама дно но это похоже единственный способ заработка в интернете!

  21. Нагиев в етом випуске обыграл Дядя,7-0 классний чувак

  22. Мой дед говорил : отдохнём на том свете . И вот прошло 40 лет . Деда уже 30 лет как отдыхает .

  23. В ВОСТОРГЕ ОТ ДМИТРИЯ!!! НАСТОЯЩИЙ МУЖЧИНА, УМНЫЙ, ЧЕСТНЫЙ. Над Юриком гнал всю передачу🤣.

  24. Пока лучшее интервью. Нагиев бесподобен. Чуваку за 50, а я смотрю на него и исхожу слюной😆 Настенька, почти 34 года

  25. Нагиев стал чсв это печально! Всегда он мне нравился но сейчас неинтересен.

  26. Очень приятный человек. Честен с собой,не строит из себя "звезду". Работает и зарабатывает деньги)Респект!

  27. Единственное интервью у Дудя, которое я посмотрел от и до. Обычно проматывал на интересные вопросы для меня.

  28. Нагиев реальный Профи, самое главно очень гибкий , цепкий и умный взгляд на нашу Российскую реальность, БРАВО!!!!
    ДУДЮ респект

  29. Просто шикарнейшее интервью! А Диме Нагиеву нереальнейший респект, и актёр и настоящий мужик 💪🏻

  30. "Нам бы до Одессы, а там морем пойдем…" – говорил, когда была трудная ситуация. 😉

  31. Нагиев один из немногих деятелей кино кого можно уважать, и есть за что.

  32. Нагиев – 18 млн

    Ивлеева – 27 млн

    = 2/3

    Итог: Не набрал, но мы всегда будем им восхищаться – он сделал всё что мог, а мог он больше чем мы все.

    Вот мы и за Севастополь ответили.

    Мзду не беру за Отчизну обидно.

    Кто понял тот найдёт.

  33. Дудь, тебе нехватает двух папоротников слева справа🤣 как в фильме

  34. Мой дед говорил, если случалось что-то хорошее:
    "И сказал Бог: "Заебись!" И заебалось…"

  35. Нагиев здоровья тебе и ещё много много классных фильмов с тобой!!!!

  36. Я пересматриваю это интервью уже раз пятый и только сейчас поняла, что Дмитрий заикается 🤔 но до этого я вообще ни разу этого не замечала, это просто шикарно

  37. Говарят когда пиздят то заикаются, очень похоже о пенсионной реформе.

  38. "Осторожно модерн "сколько лет назад я смотрела передачу и как Нагиева полюбила,так и люблю❤Красавец и мастер своего дела.

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