Sugar Mama Drama!
(upbeat music) (applause) (audience chanting rhythmically) Sit down! (audience laughs) So, Suzanne says to me “And it’s got a cooling fan inside cooling my Area 51.” (audience cheers) Okay, look, it’s time for Ask Wendy. (laughs) How are you doin’? Hiya Wendy, how you doin’? Well, what’s your name? Where are you from? I’m Christine, I’m from Houston, Texas! Are you having a good time? (audience cheers) Having fun? Yes I am! How can I help you? Well, uh, my boyfriend of 3 years, he just found out that I’m an exotic dancer. Oh! Yeah, at a club because his friend ratted me out. So, he confronted me and I told him that you know, I’m an Uber driver. (laughs) (audience laughs) Okay, how old are you? I’m 29. Do you guys live together? No. Do you have children together? No. So, this relationship is over. No um- Okay, wait wait, hold on, now. You’ve been with him for three years? How long have you been dancing? I’ve only been dancing for two years. Oh, “only”? And it’s only for the money, I need to pay my car note off. But for two years out of a three-year relationship you’ve been deceptive about something real important. Yes but I- As in, “what do you do for a living?” Yes. Okay, so, this relationship is over. But I wanted- But you’re 29, you can still get another. But don’t lead with lies, okay? You’re right, you’re right. Just sayin, girl, okay. I’ll let it go. All right, thank you! (audience claps) Come on. How are you, Wendy? My name is Spence, I’m from Miami, how you doin’? Prince? Spence. Spence, okay. So I see your crystal, you’re very spiritual. Kinda, a little bit. Now turn to the real you. Okay, all right (laughs) (audience cheers) So, here’s my situation: I’ve been “dating” this older chick for about like- Here we go! For about like uh, say about almost two years, it’s been. Just, you know like a sexual thing nothing too serious. How old are you? I’m 27. Okay. Okay, uh she’s 53. (audience reacts) Okay, yeah. Okay. All right so, the situation, okay it’s only been sexual we’ve been kicking it, everything’s been going good. So recently she told me that she loved me. (Wendy laughs) Wait but that breaks our little thing, it sort of messed the thing up, and so- Wait let’s, so everybody can stare at you Yeah. while you decrystalize. I’m not gonna touch that. Don’t. I’m not gonna touch it. Go ahead. Yeah, and so she told me she loved me and I kinda said I loved her back. But I- no no wait, but I didn’t mean it. (audience boos) Why did you say it? ‘Cause I didn’t wanna mess up the moment. And so now- She finances you, though. She sponsors me. (audience cheers) We’re grown. Yeah! I understand what you mean. She should’ve known that 53 dating with a 27-year-old, but anyway. But it’s fine, we have a good time. So, my question for you is: should I cut it off and lose my benefits? Because, now she takes me you know, on trips. Sit down. (laughs) Son, this is over. I’ve like, there’s a special place in hell for people like you. (audience cheers) Like, don’t, don’t stay with her, okay? Put the crystal away, ’cause you are not a crystal-wearing man, sit down. There we go, two relationships broken up. Only at Wendy. (upbeat music)